Not So Different

I’m back! So soon, haha! It's cause I just visited Texan’s blog (Texan in uae), and I noticed that one of the persons who commented honestly wrote how they felt sad for Muslim women. Part of their comment: ““when i see a muslim woman, i always feel sorry for her. You just have to be a good person in and you will go to heaven. I don't understand why it's a must to cover your hair”

It inspired me to share a true incident that happened that I had written about a while back.

Not So Different

We enter the store at around the same time. We are dressed similarly in long loose fitting clothes, although my dress is somewhat longer. Our heads are both covered; a matter of choice for both of us. (Well, at least for me. I know not her story but am curious enough.) From a far, we could be mistaken for as relatives... We are of similar height and both of us are noticeably Arab. From a near distance though, the differences are more apparent. Her wrinkles betray her and she is exposed as the middle aged woman she is. I smile at her and then leaving her, tend to my shopping.


It is winter and all the clothes are snuggly heavy. I am searching for the perfect outfit. My sister accompanies me on this (perhaps unfeasible) mission. I know what it is that I am looking for. I can see it in my mind and yet…if you were to ask me what exactly it is that I am hunting for, my answers would be more vague and mystifying than a “fortune teller’s.” We march up and down the aisles. Up. Down. Shirts. Pants. Skirts. Dresses. Jackets. Sweaters. I am almost at the end of the store and I still haven’t found it. Instead, it seems like the only outfit I will be trying on today is Disappointment and frustration. I am really beginning to tire of the store. I am irritated that I forced my mother to drive me here and more irritated that there’s nothing to be found. Is that shirt cute? Should I buy it? Desperately, I begin to grab anything I see and admire it (although it didn’t look any different four strolls ago.) I feel this enormous pressure to buy something…anything…but at last, reluctantly, I begin to admit the sad reality- there is nothing to buy.


I am about to leave but I take a look one more time at the pajama section. I reach for this sweet and comfy looking pajama outfit, but a hand reaches out first. It is the woman I saw earlier. “Funny,” I think to myself. “We have the same taste.” Smiling, I watch her. And once again….she doesn’t seem so different from me. She’s just older. And I’m a Muslimah.

And she’s a nun.





P.S. I was very glad that person asked a Muslim woman (Texan) what she thought. It is just infuriating when people ‘speak’ for us. Anyways, I asked that person to see the post of mine titled “An Attitude Problem”- read that, if you haven’t :D It's in "April's" archive :)

P.S.S. This is an interesting article that I read yesterday Cover Girl -a little girl decides to wear hijab (From Oprah's Magazine)

Gorgeous- This is for you

Yes, you! Come on in. Why are you peeking in so uncertainly? Gorgeous, someone lied to you. The women you see on t.v.? The ones the magazines keep telling us are the ‘most beautiful’, the ones that seem to be living the glamorous lives…they’re really not ‘real’, you know.

How many stylists do you think they have working on their hair? On their make-up? On their lips alone? How many times do you think they’ve been to the dentist to have their teeth whitened, straightened- smile perfected? How many operations do you think they’ve undergone?  

How many people do you think work on choosing the perfect outfits for them to wear and highlight their figures?

And the magazines? It’s called ‘air brushed’/ photoshopped.

Gorgeous, you need to know something.

Real women have crow’s feet (wrinkles next to their eyes)..wrinkles next to their mouth. Real women have moles, stretch marks, pimples, dark circles underneath their eyes.

If they’re mothers, their shirts may contain marks of ‘baby’s’ delightful surprises (throw-up/etc.).  It might not be perfectly matched- but they do what they can with what they can afford.

And real women…

Real women have eyes that crinkle, twinkle, and the wrinkles around their eyes? They only emphasize real women’ happiness and sorrows. And the dark circles underneath their eyes? It’s the marks of motherhood (no sleep); what could be more beautiful than that?

Real women have smiles that come from their heart, not from the dentist’s handiwork.

Real women- they’re real. They’re outta this world.

And they’re gorgeous.

And you’re one of them. 

 P.S. And real moms? Not those fake sitcom moms who wake up in make-up? As Prophet Mohammed (peace and blessings be upon him) said...Paradise lies underneath their feet.

What Are Women?

Asalamu alaikum wa rahmat Allah wa barkatoo and HellOooo!

I was planning on making this post on something entirely different. But when I visited my friend’s blogs, oldie goldie and Texan in UAE, I found they both covered what I had wanted to talk about.

So, today’s topic…it’s a bit different.

Let’s go back in time. Not too far back. 500 years (and less) and let’s see….how women were viewed…

  Take a look….

All of this is quoted from the book “Women in European History”, pgs 2-3, by Gisela Bock, which can be found: Right Here

“On the Dignity of Man (De dignitate hominis, 1486), Giovanni Pico della Mirandola spoke of men. God was speaking to Adam alone.

“The Church fathers had made Eve responsible for the Fall, and identified women with sexuality and sin.”

To Tertullian they were ‘the devil’s gateway’. [In fact], Tertullian and Chyrstomoas had answered the question ‘What is a woman?’ with a long series of vices (‘enemy of friendship, necessary evil, temptation by nature…)”.

For Thomas Aquin, woman remained as a ‘deficient’ or ‘misbegotten males’.”

Sin could only be avoided, according to St. Jerome, through chaste living, since a man’s love for a woman, who embodies evil and temptation, could not be reconciled with love of God and threatened the salvation of man. Salvation seeking men had to had to protect themselves from women; salvation-seeking women, from themselves. 

In 1595, Disputatio nova contra mulieres qua probatur eas homines non essa, was first published in Germany, anonymously and in Latin. The work …answered the question whether women are human, in the negative. It too appeared in several languages, was reprinted, copied and excerpted into the eighteenth century.

Perhaps the best clue to the state of women’s status at the time is Mary Astell’s quote in 1706:

“If all men are born free, how is it that all women are born as slaves?“

Now, let’s go even more back…Let’s go back 1,400 years ago

What are women?

He (God) it is who did create you from a single soul and therefrom did create his mate, that he might dwell with her (in love)...(Qur'an 7:189)


The Creator of the heavens and earth: He has made for you pairs from among yourselves ...Qur'an 42:1 1

Yeah…and they wonder why women are the ones embracing Islam.